Read as you please!

12.1.13

Going Away.

HERE
I sat on the floor abruptly without noticing the scissors slip out of my slim fingers. The childish sketch of mine stuck on the card waiting to dry and the pink beads half stuck on the sides, forgotten. Two nights ago, a lot of things changed. The way I felt in that moment, I still do. It circulates like the blood in my veins, at the back of my mind.I didn’t know there were so many things more to know about him when we both moved here to this dead city, which gave us so much life in return. Not that I wasn’t happy to discover all over again. I’d never know how he smells like in the mornings, how the fish he prepares tastes just like my Mother’s, how he watches the news every day. All these things I’d never know if we were just our 16 and 17 year old self back in our little town.

Now I wake up in the morning and suddenly it hits me, everything’s going to be different. It’s like sitting on a time bomb counting the days for it to explode and I know I’m not going to die but the wound will impair me all the same. I think I should pray but I don’t. I’m sitting here trying to find the reasons why I’m so afraid when I shouldn’t be. I’m wondering how I should begin telling you about it. I’ve told him I’m getting drunk on his birthday.

13 comments:

  1. Nice blog!
    Wanna like to follow each other?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies


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  2. A life parallel to mine, at the moment! So many interpretations of your entry here, but all I hear is my own story read back to me in different words.

    Everything is going to be different. :(

    xx
    Lulu
    Breakfast After 10

    ReplyDelete
  3. Fear allows us to trust, find something good to cling onto when you are afraid.
    Lots of love xx

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  4. We are afraid when we have something to lose. If it's precious, pray that it remains safe.

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  5. Any small-big change leads to fear sometimes, you will be fine :)

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  6. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  7. Blessings and happy new year
    The greatest fear we have about change is not that we won't survive the transformation as a result of the change is that we will and we wonder incessantly about the quality of living through the metamorphosis because the unknown is terrifying and resistance is instinctual.

    Have a blessed day
    stay true to self
    honor you and all you do and you will get up, over, and through
    peace

    ReplyDelete
  8. Beautiful post. Change is never easy. My hopes for the best my friend.

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  9. Change is never easy. Differences are a part of everything. They define each of us, individually. Self-destruction has never been the answer. Been there.Done that. Trust me at this, if at all, self destruction could heal anyone, every thing would've been so different. But, it is NOT the answer.
    Have a little love for everything and MOVE ON with it.
    Take Care. And try and revert your percerptions.
    Love.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hey there thanks for stopping by my blog...
    u write sooo well...I hope all is ok n im sure ull deal with the change just fine..
    love
    lookingoodfeelingfab.blogspot.in
    wud u like to follow each other?

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  11. Great and interesting post. I like it.
    I also invite you to my blog. ;)
    Yours. Have a nice day.
     
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These make me smile!