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7.2.13

An Open Secret.





Life happens to me in-between. I don’t like sex as much as I like the kisses and strokes that lead to it. Anticipation is my happy place. But lately there has been a shift. Uncertainty scares me as much as mediocrity.

About a decade ago, my Father used to work out of town. I remember a time when I waited for his arrival every day for about 3 days, not knowing the exact day of his arrival. I never asked my Mother too but I just stood by the edge of the stairs looking out the street hoping the next car that appears is him. It was a celebration every time he came home. But the goodbyes were more intense. Today I wonder how my Mother coped with the parting.

Because I think I am in dire need of the same. I don’t know a lot of things lately. I don’t know if my assumptions are true. I tell him that he has changed. He doesn’t deny it but he tells me all the right things and he means it. I think he is going to leave the city for work reasons and I find myself fighting the urge to tell him every day how much I want him to stay. But I have always been the good girlfriend, I’ve always understood. It has always come easy, with good food.

11 comments:

  1. maybe the person hasn't changed but the situation has
    nothing lasts forever and n one always wants the same things in life as they have done
    love is when youve been away and absolutely nothing has changed between you
    you can both be the same people wherever in the world you are
    much love,
    as always
    ER
    xx

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  2. Thats true, Anticipation is not a very happy place when it comes to relationships!!!!!

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  3. The not knowing is so difficult, but knowing everything up front would be boring. And then life happens.

    xx
    Lulu
    Breakfast After 10

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  4. Oh, I know the feeling of waiting for your father, the long waiting..

    Xx
    /Stephanie / http:// mydarlingsolitude.blogspot.com

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  5. sometimes it feel like peoples changes...but people does'nt, circumstances and their preferences change..!!
    god bless u...!

    http://chasingpave.blogspot.in/

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  6. Naked truth of life that is. Very beautifully written.
    I can completely relate to your blog.

    Following you.

    DO have a quick peek on my blog if you get chance..
    http://mycactusdress.blogspot.com/

    Dhara

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  7. Being apart is certainly painful but it also intensifies love. If you truly love him, perhaps you should give him a chance. Assumptions are really difficult to deal with. At times like this, it is very important to let cognition to balance emotion. Hope everything will settle down nicely. Take care!

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  8. Few things are hard to take in.
    Parting has been difficult. All along.
    Hope you draw peace with it soon.

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  9. Lovely blog :)
    I definitely follow you...would you like to follow each other?

    xoxo Nancy S.

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  10. I just discovered your blog, it's beautifully, grimly gritty, in the most gorgeous way x

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These make me smile!